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Thread: Joke Time

  1. #1
    Moderator QLD Shin-Ken 1074's Avatar
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    Joke Time

    Business Man in 1st Class, to a stunningly gorgeous air hostess:
    Business Man: What is your name?
    Hostess: Angela Benz, Sir!
    Business Man: Lovely name, any relation to Mercedes Benz?
    Hostess: Yes Sir, very close.
    Business Man: How close?



    Hostess: Same price.
    Badgezz, we don need nor stinkin' badgezz!

  2. #2
    good stuff
    Yesterdays History . . . . Tomorrows a Mystery . . . .Todays a Gift

    Regards Gibbo

  3. #3
    Senior Member WA Rusty82's Avatar
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    She'd wanna drive better for that price
    From the Kat Haven She Came.....

  4. #4
    A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop. The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike.

    The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?"

    The surgeon a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, fix 'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?"

    The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic...."Try doing it with the engine running".

    Cheers
    Max

  5. #5
    Senior Member QLD
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    Good one Max

  6. #6
    “A few months after his parents were divorced,
    Little Johnny passed by his mom's bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, "I need a man, I need a man!"
    Over the next several months, he saw her doing this often.
    One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning differently. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her.
    Little Johnny ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, and started stroking himself, moaning, "I need a bike! I need a bike!”
    Yesterdays History . . . . Tomorrows a Mystery . . . .Todays a Gift

    Regards Gibbo

  7. #7
    Senior Member NSW murf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gs110xsxz View Post
    A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop. The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike.

    The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?"

    The surgeon a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, fix 'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?"

    The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic...."Try doing it with the engine running".

    Cheers
    Max
    Yeah but im yet to see a doctor get something going after lets say twenty years LOL Cheers Murf.
    Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly

  8. #8
    Haha bang on there Murf

  9. #9

    Mile high club

    A man and a woman are seated next to each other on a flight. They start eying each other, and both realize they want to do the same thing. He slips a condom out of his pocket, and she looks delighted.
    Rear toilet? He suggests. Five minutes, she agrees and goes off. He waits five minutes, then goes and slips in there with her. Right, get that condom on, she says. Soon, they are both sighing with pleasure.
    But a sharp eyed stewardess has noticed them, and realized what they are up to, So, she humiliates them by making an announcement over the PA system. "To the lady and gentleman in the rear toilet, we know what you are doing, and it is expressly forbidden by airline regulations. Now, please put those cigarettes out and take the condom off the smoke detector."
    And what were you thinking?
    I worry about you sometimes!
    There is my opinion and then there is wrong!

  10. #10
    Senior Member QLD
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    Melwain, If it's a flight "outa" South Africa, I can't help but wonder what they were smoking?

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